What happened after I put the kaleidoscope glasses back on once I received the email from Mr. Fighter Pilot proclaiming his never-ending love for me? Well, let me tell you….we had about a 7-hour phone call talking about everything that had gone wrong. BUT – it wasn’t without him making sure that I needed to own up to what I did that made our relationship go sour. He insisted that his actions were the result of whatever I did or how I made him feel…as if that justified everything he did somehow. And that 7-hour phone call seemingly destroyed all of the work I did in therapy as we made plans to be together again……(I know, I know)…..
At this point, I am still living in Florida and he is living in Virginia but getting ready to move to Nevada. He asked me if I want to drive with him from Florida to Nevada when his schooling is finished and I am so excited to get to spend the time with him. He makes his way down to Florida to get all of his things and to see his kids before he has to make the cross-country trek to Nevada. Of course he gets into a disagreement with his soon-to-be ex and takes it out on me by starting an argument. I don’t play into it and it doesn’t sit well with him. He gets really angry and tells me he just wants to make the drive to Nevada by himself and that he’s going to go stay at a hotel for the night. Keep in mind, this is the night before we are to leave. He did stuff like this all the time. It was always drama. He wanted me to prove to him how much I loved him with grand gestures and proclamations of devotion. But, it was always when he had just said something mean and hurtful. He wanted me to chase after him. It was just a lot. BUT – here I am thinking he’s leaving, moving across the country and I’m never going to see him again…I tell him I love him, I’m not like his soon-to-be ex and somehow that’s what he needed to hear….I had to say it about 5 times though. So, I clearly have the kaleidoscope glasses securely fastened to my face as we start our journey across the country…let’s see how long they stay on…..
Until next time…xoxo
Tracy
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