Once upon a time, a retired Air Force officer met a fighter pilot.

Sounds promising, right?

Narrator: It was not.

What followed was a relationship filled with chemistry, red flags, questionable decisions, relationship “insurance,” long-distance romance, family drama, and approximately 4,782 opportunities for me to say: 

“Tracy. What are you DOING?”

I did not, in fact, ask myself that nearly enough.
Looking back, there were signs. There were moments. There were things I explained away because when you’re standing inside the circus, sometimes you don’t realize you’re also wearing the clown shoes.

This isn’t a story about bashing an ex.
It’s about my choices, my experiences, the things I couldn’t see then—and the things I can laugh about now.
Some parts are ridiculous.
Some are uncomfortable.
Some will make you want to reach through your screen, grab 2015 Tracy by the shoulders and yell:
“BABY. NO.”

I understand. Present-day Tracy would like to join you.
So, for everyone who has asked how the Fighter Pilot story started—or discovered Chapter 37 and wondered what in the fresh hell they’d stumbled into—I’ve finally put the whole saga in order.
Grab your coffee.
Secure your emotional-support snacks.
And please keep your seatbelt fastened until this relationship has come to a complete stop.