My Girls Were Moving Too, You Know

Fighter pilot dude’s kids weren’t the only ones affected by our engagement.

I had two daughters.

My oldest had just graduated from high school, and my youngest was getting ready to start high school.

So while Fighter Pilot Dude’s side of the equation was arguing, complaining and generally reacting to our engagement like we had announced the apocalypse, my girls were preparing to move across the country.

You know. Minor detail.

But before we got to that point, there was something else that happened.

When Fighter Pilot Dude and I got back together, we took my girls to dinner.

And during that dinner, he promised them he wouldn’t act the way he had before.

He knew he had hurt them.

And hurting my girls meant hurting me on an entirely different level.

It was actually an important conversation.

Until, of course, Fighter Pilot Dude had to Fighter-Pilot-Dude it.

Somewhere during his apology, he made a comment suggesting that I had something to do with our separation too.

Because an apology just isn’t complete until you distribute a little blame.

My girls weren’t buying it.

At all.

If anything, it made them dislike him more.

But we were moving forward, right?

My oldest had graduated high school and was attending college locally.

My youngest was about to leave everything she knew and start high school in a completely different state.

They were moving away from their friends, their home, and their routines.

And yet, there weren’t epic meltdowns. There weren’t constant arguments. There wasn’t a campaign to make them choose sides.

In fact, their dad came to visit before the move and said something I still remember:

“The girls know they can love both me and him, right? They don’t have to choose.”

Yep.

Their father wanted to make sure his daughters knew that loving another parental figure didn’t mean they loved him any less.

Meanwhile, on the other side…

Well.

We’ve already met the other side.

And that difference is going to matter.

Because at the time, I thought we were simply blending two families and dealing with some understandable growing pains.

Looking back?

We weren’t even playing the same game.

And that pretty much sets the stage for what happened next.

Until next time…xoxo

Tracy